Some stuff I've written, Part One

This was something I wrote in response to a news report I heard while getting ready for work that reported a study finding that the suicide rate among young women is up. I emailed the editor of a local weekly paper to see if she would be interested in it, and it turns out that she was. It was published in the "It Matters To Me" section of Sync Weekly. Enjoy...

Published in Sync Weekly
URL: http://sync.arkansasonline.com/news/2007/oct/02/it-matters-me-girls-self-esteem/

It matters to Me: Girls’ self-esteem

Ginny Wiedower

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

I am by no means an expert on mental health issues. I am, however, a female who, when getting ready for work in the morning, was jolted with a stinging static as I listened to the morning news while putting on my pinstriped pants.

“A new report from the CDC reveals that [the] suicide rate among young girls is up.” Still in my early morning pre-caffeinated fog, I vaguely listened to a manager of a local mental health rehabilitation center list several reasons that young girls commit suicide, but what has plagued me since hearing that report was the primary reason that young girls are killing themselves: low self-esteem.

I was immediately taken back to the halls of my high school, halls I walked while donning a false confidence to hide what I really was, a scared little girl who just wanted to be liked.
Low self-esteem is something I used to know. Something I used to live. Looking back, I now understand that at the root of my awkward insecurities was a self-imposed constant comparison of myself with others, from the “so beautiful they can’t be real” girls at school to the of-the-minute celebrities on TV. I was trying to reach an arbitrary “standard” that I thought, once reached, would elevate me to a pedestal of popularity and perfection.

Thank goodness that’s over. My roommate and I joked just last night about how mean girls were when we were in high school, looking at me like I had committed some heinous crime, or worse, a heinous fashion faux pas because I sat at “their” lunch table. I ended the conversation with my roommate saying that I would never go back to high school for all the money in the world, but the more I think about it, it would be pretty great to go back knowing what I know now.

I think the comfort the majority of us, myself included, grow into comes with age and comes from a process of self-discovery. What broke my heart as I listened to the morning news and heard that young girls are killing themselves due to low self-esteem is the fact that those girls won’t have the chance to journey through the process of self-discovery that leads to a level of self-comfort that leads to true confidence that leads to freedom.

Young girls have it rough these days. These girls, who don’t yet understand the concept of Photoshop, who don’t understand that reality TV isn’t real, are inundated daily with images of scantily clad, perfectly sculpted, almost non-human actresses, models, and the like. What’s worse is that those images are portrayed as the “standard” for beauty.

Take Britney Spears’ quasi-comeback VMA performance for example. I watched her writhing on stage in her glittery lingerie and thought “Wow, I hope I look like that after I have two kids.” Who am I kidding? I would love to look like that now! But the next day the media was flooded with reports of how grotesque and disgusting Britney’s body looked. I was shocked.

Imagine being a 13-year-old girl hearing that Britney Spears, who looks to be well below the national average women’s clothing size of 11, is grotesque and has a body that jiggles like Jell-O. I imagine a fragile-minded young girl might think that if Britney Spears’ body isn’t good enough, mine is definitely way below par, thus initiating a cycle of self-doubt and insecurity, resulting in low self-esteem.

So what can be done about this? Can we change the mindset of millions of Americans? Can we apply mandates in Hollywood that ban [waifish] actresses and celebrities? Odds are slim to none. But I know what I can and will do. I will make a point to throw out a few more “you go girls” everyday. I will do my best to appreciate the truly beautiful human characteristics: intelligence, kindness, compassion, and warmth. Do I think that is where it should stop? Absolutely not. But like everything else in life, we have to start somewhere.